Monthly Archives: October 2005

Awards screenings kick into high gear

There have been a few scattered “For Your Consideration” screenings here in London already, but they’re now starting to come fast and furious.
This weekend alone, there are screenings of Nanny McPhee, Wallace & Gromit: Curse of the Wererabbit, Corpse Bride, March of the Penguins, Kiss Kiss Bang Bang, and Batman Begins. I’ve seen Batman Begins, and don’t have any particular interest in Nanny McPhee, but I’m looking forward to seeing all the others. I’m not sure I’ll make to any of this weekend’s screenings, but there’s always next weekend… (This weekend’s “Wallace & Gromit” screening, by the way, is clearly aimed at Academy members with kids–it’s on a Sunday morning, they’re giving out four tickets per member instead of the usual two, and they’re promising an opportunity to “meet the costume characters and have your photo taken with them.”)
Of course, not every distributor can afford to rent out West End venues for multiple screenings. The distributors of Le Grand Voyage send out an e-mail reminder of two upcoming Academy screenings, adding, “We are sure you are aware of the considerable costs involved in providing free screenings to BAFTA members. As a small independent distributor, we regret that– apart from the Academy screenings above–we will be unable to offer any further free screenings to members, as the expense is simply too great.” I’m very sympathetic to this, and I plan on seeing the film at one of the two screenings.

Singing Snakes on a Plane

As part of Yankee Fog’s ongoing commitment to bringing you the latest Snakes on a Plane news, we wish to direct your attention to Snakes on a Plane: the T-Shirt and Snakes on a Plane:the Song.
Unfortunately, the audio quality on the song is rather low, perhaps because the snakes have infiltrated the recording studio itself. Still, muddied though it may be, the singer’s tragic dilemma shines through:
You’re a cold, cheatin’ woman, and there’s nothin’ to gain.
Do I let you break my heart, or stick with snakes on a plane?

Strange Rites

It is an unquestionable theological principle that anybody who is even slightly less religious than I am is a godless heathen, while anyone who is even a jot more religious is a dangerous fanatic. That’s why I’m glad to have found a synagogue in London that is very near the level of observance that I grew up with.
But there’s one major difference that never fails to jar me. In every Jewish service I’ve been to, there’s always been a “prayer for our country,” which asks that wisdom be granted to our nation’s leaders. In the US, I’ve seen some variations that specifically mention the President and the vice-president, and others that just cover all the bases by praying for “all who exercise just and rightful authority.”
But at our synagogue in London, the prayer includes “the Queen and her advisors.” That’s logical enough, but it always feels a little odd to my rebellious Colonial soul to be praying for the Queen.
In any case, shana tovah to my Jewish readers, Ramadan mubarak to my Muslim readers, and to everybody else, erm, have a nice day.

A Minicab Conversation

Our minicab driver has a Caribbean accent, although it’s been faded by years in England. There’s a “Dominica” sticker on his dashboard, and one on his windshield.
He tells us that English children have no discipline. He’s carried passengers with kids, and watched in amazement as the kids treated the parents “like servants,” yelling at them, and even cursing.
“My mother would never let us get away with anything,” he says. “When she sent you to the store, she’d spit in a corner, and tell you you’d better get back before it dried. You hurried. There was a tree near the house–it looked a little like that one, over there–and when she wanted to punish you, she’d pull off a branch, and strip it, and–”
He mimes whipping. “Then she’d tell you to go down to the beach–we lived near the sea–and swim in it.”
“Salt water,” I say. “Ouch!”
“Salt water,” he agrees. “And you had to do it, because when you came back…” He mimes his mother running her finger along the back of his neck, and then licking her finger to check for salt. “And if you just put your head in, she’d lift up your shirt.” He mimes the same action, this time on his back. “She knew.”
He drives for another minute or two, and then adds, “My brothers and my sisters, they’re here in England, but they’ve sent their kids to her to raise, so they can just work, and send back their money.”
“Are your sisters as tough as your mom?” I ask.
“No, they’re not,” he says, and then adds, “My dad is white.” I’m not sure if that’s meant as an explanation, or just as a new train of conversation. He goes on, “He’s lived in Dominica for so long, though. When I go visit them from England, he says, ‘Go back to your country, and take your cold weather with you.'”
And then, unfortunately, we’re at our destination. We pay our fare, and go our separate ways.

Backstage at the Emmies, 2005

My friends Rob Kutner and Sheryl Zohn have written up their experiences backstage (and onstage) at the Emmies. Here it is, reprinted with their permission. If you enjoy it, you might also want to read Rob’s Emmy writeup from 2004.
Dear Friends and Family,
With the recent events in New Orleans hanging heavily on everyone’s minds, we thought we’d distract you for at least a few moments with something utterly frivolous: our account of the 2005 Emmy Awards. Yes “our,” because this year, Rob has enlisted some help from his trusty cub reporter/Emmy “+1,” Sheryl.
We begin our story at the Standard Hotel in downtown Los Angeles, where the “Daily Show” housed its entire staff. Of course, not everyone at the hotel was a fan of the show. At check- in, Rob’s co-worker Jason Reich overheard the following conversation concerning one Mr. Jon Stewart:
Clerk #1: “Hey, did you see the guy from ‘Half-Baked’ is staying here? But he’s grayed a little.”
Clerk #2: “Yeah, he has his own show on Comedy Central now.”
Clerk #1: “Oh, I only watch Comedy Central for ‘Mind of Mencia’.”
Fortunately, several members of the Academy were more familiar with Stewart’s work (and that of his 13 writers), and so Sunday afternoon we found ourselves in a limousine on our way to the Shrine Auditorium for the 57th Annual Emmy Awards. As in past years, the city was clogged with limos, stretch hummers, and even a stretch Mini-Cooper (Is that just a Cooper?). But not everyone believed in motorized transportation: From our car window, we saw Zach Braff (“Scrubs”) passing by on foot and waving at all of us suckers stuck in traffic, as well as David Letterman sitting at a bus stop, in his best Emmy formal shorts and T-shirt.

Second Printing

Matthew and I have been informed by our editor that they’re printing another 4000 copies of The Government Manual for New Superheroes, on top of our original print run of 9000. Obviously, this is good news.
One of the things I never realized is how hard it is for an author to get a sense of how well his book is selling. I’ve been somewhat obsessively checking our Amazon sales rank, which has generally been hovering between 20,000 and 70,000, but I really haven’t had any way to calculate what that means. I’m glad to know we’re doing well.
And I’m also glad to see that, as of this writing, The Government Manual for New Superheroes is at 10,581 on the Amazon sales chart. At this rate, we’ll be in the top 10,000 in no time.